A Tremolo

All the leaves were falling down

They fell into the night upon the ground

They didn’t realize the sun of summer had arrived.

 

The flowers died out one by one

Their petals wilted in the midnight sun

Succumbing to the fate that you had brought upon me too.

 

I wanted to admit defeat

Go to a place where we could meet

In the stars

 

But even though I cried for you

There was more, yet, I had to prove

And forgive you.

 

A tempest then came howling in

With scorching winds of black and blue and grey

Tearing up serenity and taking flight from me.

 

The windows trembled with their force

I screamed, but soon my voice grew far too hoarse

I shivered as the walls fell down, the shattering windows’ sound.

 

I dreamt of you amidst the glass

Your smiling face moved far too fast

As in a blur

 

And even though I could not hear

The words you spoke to me were clear

Like falling rain.

 

I fled that sight of tragedy

I ran a race that’d never set me free

With memories as tangible as the road I never found.

 

I wandered long and wondered hard

If all my love for you had gone too far

And with your absence I then feared that agony drew near.

 

I heard your voice speaking to me

But strange, your words gave no relief

Of my pain

 

I felt your hand upon my arm

A hand to keep me safe from harm

Safe from me.

 

Visions, all I heard and felt

In truth, the world beneath the sun did melt

And as it did my crumbling soul refused to pay your toll.

 

My days went by without refrain

Like a sadist, you forced me to remain

But though your hold was oh-so-tight, your grip I didn’t fight.

 

Frightened from your sight, I hid

But silently to me, you bid

For me to come

 

Eventually I ventured out

But I did not find you without

For you were dead.

 

A funeral came marching past

Their drums were pounding high into the sky

I followed them in misery to see who it would be.

 

I slowly moved my aching feet

And stepped in rhythm with the macabre beat

I dropped my head and loosed a cry for the life that went awry.

 

I scrambled up the column’s line

Ignored the fear of what I’d find

Ahead of me.

 

Into the casket then I peered

And realized my greatest fear

For it was you.

 

Your eyes were wide, your mouth was slack

You stared at me and laid upon your back.

I mourned the day you left this land and wept upon your hand.

 

I thought I felt you breathing still

But my heart’s desire you could not fulfill

You were dead and dead is gone, and I could not move on.

 

We carried you so faithfully

Across the landscape, and then we

Wailed for you

 

We counted our steps to the church

And placed you high upon a perch

To gaze at you.

 

I raised my glass into the sky

And shouted out a toast for you and I

And while the storm outside raged on, our bets with Fate we waged.

 

Our days were short, our time was done

The lives we’d weaved were now coming undone

We wiped our tears and bid farewell to face the tolling bell.

 

Our memories were failing us

And in our thoughts we couldn’t trust

One another

 

We parted ways and I alone

Embarked upon the road to home

To find you

 

O’er the hills and cross the sands

I lost myself in many distant lands

Forgetting who I was, though I could never forget you.

 

The promises you’d made to me

Scattered like the soil strewn fallen leaves

Floating on the wings of time subjected to my rhyme.

 

In many tongues I’d said that I

Would never hang my head and cry

In memory

 

This tristesse tremolo I sing

Hardly dulls the pain it brings

In missing you

 

I miss you.

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About korastoynova

With my husband, Simeon Stoynov, I travel the world in pursuit of our dreams, of which we have many. And, thankfully, all of our dreams are within our reach. We have made sure of it. From our lives as competitive ballroom dancers, a life which has taken us around the world and back, to my struggles to becoming an author, to Simeon's love of business, we have learned what it means to sacrifice, to apply ourselves with discipline, and to enjoy the journey to success. Our lives truly are made of the stuff of dreams.
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2 Responses to A Tremolo

  1. lolitasays says:

    Beautiful poem.

  2. korastoynova says:

    Thank you : )

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